Help! I am A Newbie Online Dater!
The idea of meeting boys and girls all from your laptop or smartphone is exciting. You have a sea of options unlimited by space. You have access to people you would normally have a tough time meeting. But, as most people soon realize, there is a way to go about this that gets you results. The right approach might seem elusive to the neophyte online dater and may lead to frustrations.
But online dating never was rocket science. Maybe for the people that create the websites – the confusing coding and other things normal people would find themselves lost in. But when it comes to being a successful new dater, it only takes a few steps.
Here are 3 must-do things if you do not want to either spend forever just sending unreturned messages, or quit in a huff, frustrated.
1.Your Profile Picture Matters, Really Matters
However much of a great person you think you are, your profile picture might be the one thing that kills your chances of meeting a girl. Humans are visual beings, and when it comes to online dating, your profile picture can send all sorts of messages to the people checking you out.
You want to use a profile picture that not only accurately shows what you look like, but also who you are, or at least who you might be.
Some things to avoid on your profile picture include:
- Being with another person: Which one is you?
- Obscure Pictures: Make sure your picture is well lit and clear. Most phones today are able to capture decent photos. Just make sure there is enough light. And don’t use one where you were too far away from the camera. People actually have to see you.
- No Shirt/flexing: You may have been blessed with an asset or two, or maybe you busted your behind in the gym to get them. But, however you got them, showing them off on your profile pic will make you look shallow and devoid of a modicum of class.
- Using an ancient Picture: We get that you looked great 10 years ago, but then that’s 10 years ago. If you haven’t noticed, not everyone has a time machine. They are trying to date you now, so use a current photo.
2.Make Sure Your Profile is Descriptive Yet Short
No one ever got out of bed, excited to read a long bio of some random guy. Make sure your profile is short enough to not bore anyone yet long enough to give a reasonable glimpse into who you are. No need to tell people about your nightmarish experience with high school bullies, or how great you were at jump rope in first grade.
Things to Consider When Writing Your Profile:
- Be Honest: You are going to soon be connected with someone. And if said connection is based on a lie, the whole house will come crashing down.
- Do not be Negative: Your life may be oozing with negative energy for one or more reasons. But, there is no need to tell the world you have never met about it. Do not write about how you have been disappointed all your life and are just looking for someone to love you.
3.The First Chats Are Important
The first message you send will further show what kind of person you are. The most important thing to remember is never to send spam robotic messages. People want to feel special, and one way to do that is by sending them a message that shows you have taken time to read their profile. Mention their interests in your message and be as honest as possible.
It’s also important not to overdo anything. Do not be overly serious but don’t be as goofy as to paint an immature picture.
Try Again… and again
You may have to send a couple of messages before you get any responses even if you have done everything right. That is normal but as a newbie, it's easy to think perhaps online dating is just not for you. Sometimes, things may actually kick off and stall after some communication. Hell, things do crumble even after date 2. Just enjoy the process and keep trying.
- Previous entry: How to Use Descriptive Words on Your Dating Profile
- Next entry: When to Put a Label on Your Relationship